Litany List

Well its been an eventful couple of weeks since I had posted last.

Last week I was house/pet sitting for my boss. I enjoy spending time with her dog, Batty but I forget how demanding animals can be. I live with two cats and a dog but I share them with three other adults. Batty insisted upon sleeping on the bed with me and then, despite my best efforts, she took over the bed (cat owners may snicker now). I had a "what the hell" moment when I realized that Batty had somehow over the course of the night managed to put on one of my bras. I had hung it over the bedpost and when I woke up Batty was wearing one of the straps as a collar.

Why does it always seem extra painful the day after a long weekend to come in to work? I had scheduled an appointment with a graduate student for 9:30AM yesterday. For some reason I had forgotten about Memorial Day being a work holiday. Being Canadian I am still a little bemused by American holidays. President's Day? I think most Canadians would snort their coffee if they read that the Canadian government had declared a Prime Minister's Day.

My week was going pretty well until today. I might be a little cynical when it comes to human nature so why is it when you are hit upside with the evil dealings personally it is always shocking. Now, I have worked very hard to develop a credit rating here in the US. For those who are unaware there are no links between Canadian and American banks. TD Waterhouse Investments notwithstanding. Ergo, trying to convince creditors to pay extra for a Canadian credit check is virtually futile.

Today I was very happy to see that my bank had deposited my monthly paycheque early. Upon further perusal I realized my balance was far too low. Calling my bank is always an exercise in patience. Calling my bank and hearing that somehow a mysterious $746.11 charge was in process pushed me beyond my limits. Hearing that even though I could assure them that I have neither purchased anything at Staples nor had lost my mind and travelled back from Indiana overnight, there was nothing my bank could do for me. When the charge went through I could dispute the charge.

(Not a verbatim transcript)

Me: So you are telling me that even though I never made the purchase you can't stop the charge from going through.

Bank minion: No, the charge has to be processed before you can dispute the charge.

Me: How long is the dispute process?

Bank minion: Weeeelllll, that depends on whether the merchant disputes your dispute.

Me: Well I have already spoken to the store and apparently a man made this purchase yesterday evening at a Staples in Valparaiso, Indiana.

(Local) Bank minion currently looking at my bank record: Well where are you right now?

Me: ? How is that relevant? For the record I am in Houston, Texas and have never set foot in Valparaiso or Indiana for that matter. Also for the record I am not a man. Can I cancel the card so that no other charges go through?

Bank minion: Are you sure that you want to do that? It will take 7-10 business days for a new card to be issued.

Me: Yes, please cancel the card, will you mail the new card to my house?

Bank minion: Well, actually you will have to go into your branch to order a new card first.

Me: Unintelligible mumblings. Fine I will do that tomorrow. How long will it take for the charge to be posted so that I can call you to dispute the charge?

Bank minion: It could take 4-6 days for it to post. You will have to file the dispute at your bank branch too.

Me: This is the customer service line yes? What do you do? Other than tell me what I can't do or will have to visit my branch to actually do.

Bank minion: Was that a question?

I am hoping against hope that the thief is as stupid as they are amoral. Apparently whoever was using my card numbers also decided to use their Staples Reward card at the same time. Must collect those points baby even when using stolen credit card numbers.